Stepping Stones to Self Fulfilment: Supporting Transgendered Youth on the Path to Authenticity

By: Samantha Prior and Deanna McArthur

“Imagine the feeling of being rejected. Somebody saying, ‘I don't want to be friends with you’. Think about that twisting feeling you feel inside. Imagine operating in the world, not feeling like you belong in your own body. Having difficulty showering, having difficulty being able to face people and not experiencing affirmation to the core of who you are.”

This is how Johnathan Kuipers, Director of Mental Health at the Skipping Stone Foundation, a Calgary based charity which supports trans and gender diverse youth, describes the daily struggles of being transgendered in our modern world.

“Trans people face disproportionate health disparities as opposed to cisgender people,” said Kuipers. “Especially when it comes to youths.”

The problem has gotten so widespread that in 2017, when the Canadian Trans Youth Health Survey  was conducted, it found that almost 65% of transgender youth in Alberta between the ages of 19 and 25 have considered suicide at some point in their lives. More than 90% of trans youth in Alberta between 14 and 18 years old don’t seek help for mental health issues because they’re scared their parents will find out the truth about their gender identification.

What is the Solution?

In Alberta, we have a significant shortage of services available for trans and gender diverse youth and their families. Currently, the only way to address these gaps is through the help of charities and non-profit organizations.

This became abundantly clear to Skipping Stone co-founder Lindsay Peace when her son, Ace, came out as transgendered. She saw personally how difficult it was to navigate the system and help her son find the gender-affirming care he needed. Because of this, Peace wanted to find a way to support other families of transgender youth.

Peace and Amelia Marie Newbert founded the Skipping Stone Foundation in 2017. Newbert joined up with Peace to form the foundation as she saw first hand the struggles of transitioning in Alberta and wanted to make it easier for the next generation to transition.

“Lindsay and Amelia have been amazingly strong advocates for the community and work so hard to empower trans youth,” said Kuipers.

The Skipping Stone Foundation initially started as a scholarship foundation and was later expanded to offer a variety of programs including art groups, peer mentorship programs, and educational programs. These programs are for everyone from the transgender person themselves to their parents and partners. The foundation also helps connect kids and families with medical services such as hormone replacement therapy, counselling, and more.

Externally from the Foundations core programs, they act as navigators for trans people and their families. The Foundation is there to help circumnavigate the different parts of the transition including their personal transition (coming to terms with their identity through therapy), social transition (providing gender-affirming clothing and identifying their preferred pronouns), legal transition (legally changing their name or gender marker), and medical transition (hormone replacement therapy, or surgery).

Education is Key

Ace was lucky to have the support of a loving mother who stood by his side every step of the way, but others in Ace’s position may not be as lucky. The Skipping Stone works to help parents understand and accept their child for who they truly are.

“Some parents come in saying ‘I don’t understand what’s going on with my kid. This is just a phase, right?’,” said Kuipers. “Parents go through a transition as well. They come to reconcile that their child is different than what they thought. There’s a journey there for them too. We act as a source of education and information, and provide a space where parents can ask all of their questions, and get some answers.”

“To see that shift in people once you provide them with a little bit of education is amazing. To see a parent become affirming, seeing their kid growing up and on hormones and feeling affirmed. To then later see the same parents become mentors for other parents of kids who are transgendered. It’s the perfect success.”

Today, many of the diverse individuals who have been touched by the Skipping Stone are now volunteering to help the Foundation with one of its main goals, awareness. Kuipers hopes that the annual Pride Festival in Calgary will further help Albertans gain understanding and bring awareness to some of the struggles trans youth are still facing to this day.

“Typically, Pride is rainbows and sunshine and glitter, it’s a celebration,” he said. “The reality is that it’s not a celebration for some people. It’s still a very political movement. It’s a protest for authenticity, for space, for visibility, for medical services. Some people aren’t ready to celebrate because they don’t really have a lot to celebrate, they are still facing significant barriers.”

“It’s not to be negative, its about bringing light and shedding visibility on the strengths and the stresses of this community.”

Bringing light to this topic will help break barriers down for the trans community and the youth within it. With awareness comes the ability to help and affect as many lives as possible because at the end of the day the Skipping Stone wants these kids to feel that they can contribute to society as authentically they possibly can.

Supporting the Skipping Stone Foundation

There are a number of ways Albertans can do their part to support the Skipping Stone Foundation. The foundation is always looking for volunteers to help to educate the public, attend community events and festivals, as well as join their mentorship program. Donations can also be made on their website.

Additionally, in partnership with Spot Power, a local electricity and natural gas company, Albertans can support the Skipping Stone Foundation, just by paying for an everyday expense like electricity.

Albertans who sign up for electricity services with Spot Power, using the Skipping Stone Foundation’s landing page, will have a portion of their electricity bill go directly back to the Skipping Stone Foundation to support its programs and services, every month.

“Electricity is an item that homeowners are already using and spending money on, so why not have a portion of this money be used to help a great cause?” said Madeline Low, Director of Spot Power. “In addition to that, we have been providing the Skipping Stone Foundation electricity for their office at cost to help them reduce their operating expenses. We are proud to be able to give back to such a great organization.”

“The fact that Spot Power has been providing us electricity at cost is fantastic,” said Kuipers. “Electricity costs are going up, so the savings for us are significant. Plus, when you run a non-profit you sure learn how to stretch a dollar, so every little bit that we can save helps. Even if it’s $50 or $100, that could mean providing snacks to hungry attendees at our groups, or the ability to treat a group of youth to something like a drum circle.”

Spot Power is also proud to be sponsoring the Calgary Pride Festival again this year. Join us as we celebrate Calgary’s diversity at the Pride Parade and Pride in the Park Sunday, September 1 from 11:00 am to 6:00 pm.

To learn more about the Skipping Stone Foundation click here. To support the Skipping Stone Foundation through Spot Power click here.